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August 8, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Loved it! This fanfic rocks! I've never read one like this. Please update soon! ^_~
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August 7, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Your story has potential. It need some work on grammar, spelling and puncuation. As well as the conjugation of some words. Like when you have one of them saying "You welcome" you need to fix that to be "You're welcome." or "You are welcome" As I said the story line has merit. It just needs some grammar editing. I suspect that your first language is not English. If that is the case then the lapse can be forgiven. But you could still take it through a spell check in Word or Word Perfect.
Ok now, all constructive critisism aside.
I like the idea that Eva looks like an elf. With the green hair and pointed ears. The fangs are an interesting add in. The fact that Erik has gotten over Christine is good as well. It will make for some good conflict in the future. All in all its a good start for this kind of storyline. Keep up the good work :)
Ok now, all constructive critisism aside.
I like the idea that Eva looks like an elf. With the green hair and pointed ears. The fangs are an interesting add in. The fact that Erik has gotten over Christine is good as well. It will make for some good conflict in the future. All in all its a good start for this kind of storyline. Keep up the good work :)
schedule
June 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
very cute so far I hope you continue