schedule
April 3, 2008 at 12:00 AM
*Review Repost*
(I realized I wasn't logged in when I made my review... sorry :D)
I fell in love with your story!
Though the topic of Bella getting impregnated is a popular base for many fanfic's, you broached the subject from a different point of view, (that vampire's can in fact have children,) making the story all your own.
Chapters 2 and 4 are absolutely amazing, for reasons I'm sure you know, but it wasn't just the erotic scenes that made them work. It was how you made them so intimate as well. Edward's concern for Bella is extremely predominate, like Stephanie portrays it in her books.
The relationship you have going in the first couple of chapters, between Edward and Emmett, makes me laugh every time I read it. The way they raze each other is truly comical and factual. (I have a bunch of older brothers and see that sort of thing a lot.)
I’m still unsure about how you portrayed Bella’s feelings on her having a baby. I always pictured her, if the event does actually happen in Breaking Dawn, to be a little more jubilant about it. Although I see where you’re coming from with her feelings of uneasiness and doubt, I would have figured her to react differently to Edward’s suggestions to alternate options, focusing more on the fact that it was her and Edward’s child and not on the fact that she would feel bad about getting rid of it.
Maybe I feel as though that fact wasn’t stressed enough, but that’s just my opinion.
I must say that I was a little heart broken that the story seemed to be over, seeing as it hasn't been updated since the 27th of December, and I'm just curious if you intent to write a follow up story about the pregnancy and child rearing, or are you just going to leave it at that.
I truly hope that you decide to continue your story; you are an amazingly gifted writer.
I was also wondering if you could post a link to you other stories, on fanfiction.net or any other sites you post to, I attempted to search for you but came up short.
Best of luck with your future writings!
(I realized I wasn't logged in when I made my review... sorry :D)
I fell in love with your story!
Though the topic of Bella getting impregnated is a popular base for many fanfic's, you broached the subject from a different point of view, (that vampire's can in fact have children,) making the story all your own.
Chapters 2 and 4 are absolutely amazing, for reasons I'm sure you know, but it wasn't just the erotic scenes that made them work. It was how you made them so intimate as well. Edward's concern for Bella is extremely predominate, like Stephanie portrays it in her books.
The relationship you have going in the first couple of chapters, between Edward and Emmett, makes me laugh every time I read it. The way they raze each other is truly comical and factual. (I have a bunch of older brothers and see that sort of thing a lot.)
I’m still unsure about how you portrayed Bella’s feelings on her having a baby. I always pictured her, if the event does actually happen in Breaking Dawn, to be a little more jubilant about it. Although I see where you’re coming from with her feelings of uneasiness and doubt, I would have figured her to react differently to Edward’s suggestions to alternate options, focusing more on the fact that it was her and Edward’s child and not on the fact that she would feel bad about getting rid of it.
Maybe I feel as though that fact wasn’t stressed enough, but that’s just my opinion.
I must say that I was a little heart broken that the story seemed to be over, seeing as it hasn't been updated since the 27th of December, and I'm just curious if you intent to write a follow up story about the pregnancy and child rearing, or are you just going to leave it at that.
I truly hope that you decide to continue your story; you are an amazingly gifted writer.
I was also wondering if you could post a link to you other stories, on fanfiction.net or any other sites you post to, I attempted to search for you but came up short.
Best of luck with your future writings!
schedule
March 30, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I love it. Please wright more soon. Your a talented wrighter!!! ^^
schedule
March 21, 2008 at 12:00 AM
*tear* how sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!!
schedule
March 12, 2008 at 12:00 AM
this story is beautiful. it is as if i am reading the 4th book already. really I can't wait until you add more. ^_^ so happy!!! ^_^
schedule
March 3, 2008 at 12:00 AM
this is such a brilliant fic! i cant wait for more!
schedule
February 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
This is a really good story so far and I can't wait to read more! :)
schedule
February 19, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I am loving this fic so far. It's the first I've found that is believable outside of the original series. I cannot wait to read more.
JLB
JLB
schedule
February 11, 2008 at 12:00 AM
your story is so good please update it soon I want to know what happens!
schedule
February 10, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Awesome story! Keep it coming! I gotta see the little one! You rock!
schedule
February 1, 2008 at 12:00 AM
omg i am so totally obsessed with this story, it goes on doesn't it???? this story is my opium I NEED IT!!! MORE! MORE!