rate_review Reviews

I see you’ve joined the “let’s pet me on my head” group since lately that seems to be what most of my friends started doing. Is it my hair?? My little brain?? Sympathy for my mind’s repeated standby-modus-thingies?? My my my, we’ll never know the answer to that secret. ;P

Alright, let’s get to the PWLP (Porn with lovely porn *hehe*) part: I LOVE IT (thus the religion thing)!!! Your language is so fantastic and rich in warm images and smells that I get completely and hopelessly enamored over and over again whenever you update. The best addiction I’ve ever had. *sighs contently*
The thing is just, your smutty moments (the sexy morning scene was too yummy to describe it with words of awe…) aren’t only causing sweet oblivion to Jake and Lis, but they also make ME forget everything which turns out to be rather embarrassing when it comes to writing the review afterwards cuz I go all like, “Story? Yummy. Anything else? Huh?? Who am I, by the way?!?” Not good. Can’t stop it, though. As I said above, I’m addicted to every tiny bit of your story, your replies to my reviews and whatever else there may be.
And NO, I didn’t think this chapter was confusing. Both Jake and Lis are obviously confused (which doesn’t keep them from doing it like bunnies, though…) which I can easily relate to, but the chapter as it is was not. Please don’t change anything. It would adulterate, trust me.

No cookies to me this time, though. *sobs* I’m simply too stupid to realize “what is that annoying feeling that pokes at Jacob’s chest”. :’( Must have studied too much of Canon Law to get that. Still, it doesn’t change anything about the fact that I’m so silly… *sobs turning into wails*

Ahem. When I told you to keep your fingers off of Edward, I did NOT mean for you to encourage him to have his fingers in… ooops, I swear it’s just a typo!!! I meant ON!!! Anyway, to have his fingers on himself. On. Definitely on. Did you get it?? ON!!! *phew… wipes sweat away*
Honestly, I don’t like the bad influence you seem to have on Mr. Cullen. If I were his mother, I’d tell your mother to keep our kids from playing with each other, just so you know. Will have to talk to Esme about this since she’s the only one to play the mother figure without making it seem obscene… ;)

Edward under Jacob… mmh, if you prolong that into a little threesome, I’ll stop the shocked face this second and change it into a smirk. Hehe.

And I couldn’t help noticing reaper07’s review (especially the last line of it), which makes me wonder: Kann es sein, dass du aus Deutschland oder Österreich bist?? :)

By the way, I love your profile. ;) It made me laugh out loud when I read it. You’re too funny (“He glitters people. 'Nough said”, “Once you go Black, you never go back.”). I guess I just have to love you, too (as a worshipper loves her goddess, of course). *lol*

Here comes my highly regarded and just as appreciated Poll answer (should stop listening to Muse’s “Megalomania”… the title has some really bad influence on my ego…). After having taking the “50:50 chance” (of course, the computer wouldn’t work and left me stuck with all four possibilities as before), I decided to call someone for help (unfortunately, however, my first telephone joker said “Edward who??” and the second one threatened me with heavy lawsuit if I didn’t keep my fingers off her beloved Mr. Cullen. I told her to go to hell after which she – completely surprisingly – hung up on me. Such a touchy bitch…). So what am I supposed to do?!? I can’t do this on my own, making a decision on a topic like this!

*simply faints*

*is still out, but the medics are optimistic for her to recover rather quickly…*

*must stop the fainting now as Carlisle was called into the ambulance and called me “little hysteric drama-queen“… that’s so not true! I only faked fainting like four times in Edward’s presence so far, and I always had very good reasons to do so (especially once, when he didn’t agree to see the movie I wanted to watch…)!!!*

*must remember to NOT get Carlisle anything for Christmas again, ever*

*pouts*

Back and full of Carlisle's sedatives (yummy…) – which I needed for that utterly hot excerpt of “Edward’s Thirst” – I have finally decided to take answer 5) which is: GOD DAMN IT, POST THE STORY ALREADY – EDWARD WILL ALWAYS BE MINE ANYWAY, SO DON’T GET YOUR HOPES UP!!!
In other words (for those who listen to the little, fairy-like buzzing in their minds): Thou shallst post (ABER FLOTT!!!) the oneshit… uhm, oneshot. Sorry. *lol* Today’s absolutely not my typing-day… ;)

I just adore those kinda polls! Can we get another one in the next chapter, like on the topic “who of you idiots left five reviews for my story?!?!?”
Pleeeease?? ;P

Oh yeah, you updated! :)

I loved it. Their relationship is so intense and so confusing at the same time. He better imprinted on her and doesn't realize it yet. ;)

It was really great. It was hot and also a little sad because they both fight their demons and yet they find comfort in each other. I love it.

Hoffe, du postest bald ein neues Kapitel. :)

that was hot! Can´t wait whats coming next...

Can’t… review… need cold shower. Need to… turn… brain… on… again…
WOW!!!
*breathless*

(but a 100% sure that founding this new religion with worshipping you was the right thing! *lol*)

Won’t review anyway as I absolutely hate you because this chapter was so brilliantly done in expressions and words that I feel like a little, untalented maggot. :'(

Alright, my brain is back on think-modus, so here’s the proper review:
YOU laughed hard with my review?? Now honestly, woman, are you kidding?? Whenever I read your replies to my reviews, they like SO make my day and put a smile on my face! I just love your kind of humor. ;)

Oh God, please, please don’t let this wonderful story make me turn into a “Team Jacob” supporter… I’d never get my story posted if I decide to switch teams now. *lol* And Edward would probably sulk for days, getting wrinkles and everything. He’s such a diva. *rolls eyes* I don’t want you taking him up in your “my imaginative derails and do ’bad’ stuff to him”, either, by the way. That’s already MY job, understood?! You can walk around and make Jacob forget that he’s got a brain and let him do nice thingies instead to make us support the “Team Cold Shower”, but keep your fingers off of Mr. Cullen. *looks VERY stern*

I also think the POV changes were excellently done. Especially in this story I find it highly interesting to see things from both (or more) sides. Don’t worry, hun. You’re doing so well that I’m slowly running out of words to praise you. ;)

By the way, this is what happens when someone's too stupid to write one looooong review: they just write three. ;P