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for Little Pet Shop of Dreams

by MBJohns

person Duskalia
schedule December 8, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I hope you'll write more, I want to know what will happen next =D
schedule June 16, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Alright, here's my honest opinion: although I can partly guess what'll happen (judging by the last few lines of the chapter and the story's summary), you got me hooked onto your story. It's really well done so far, rather mysterious and funny at the same time, and you definitel built up quite some tension there. I suggest you better don't "put up the writing pad and stop writing altogether"... otherwise I'll be tempted to send someone to come after YOU. *lol*

By the way, you're funny. Had to laugh really hard when I read your disclaimer ("*pulls waistband of pants out and checks* Yep! I still have all my man parts which means I’m not Stephanie Meyer..."? Priceless!)... ;) Besides, male authors are rare in this section. Nice to know there are some, though...

Oh, and even though I know it's not beta'd (yet), I thought I'd let you know that you once slipped out of Edward's POV (“That maybe true, but Mom and Dad gave us a wish for us to grant. It seems Alice is more than willing to grant it and I intend to grant it as well. So what do you intend to do?” Edward asked knowing that by the look that she was giving him, he knew what the answer was going to be.). Otherwise, minor errors, easy to ingore. :)
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