Full Disclaimer: I don't own the Bible although I do have several copies. This is an original work of fiction that I am not making money on yet. When I add the last chapter here, it will be ready for publishing. But you should know that the real version is not being posted here. That's for my eyes only until it hits the press. As for the warnings, there will be a lot of mentions of sexual acts and situations, however I will not be writing any specific scenes portraying them. Don't be disappointed, you can always use your imagination.
Summary: I’ve heard people say it, but now I know for sure; God has a sense of humor. And this isn’t all that funny. He just has to be kidding! I’m supposed to marry a known prostitute? Seriously?! I’m sure He knows the phrase about making a ho a housewife. After all, it is the world’s oldest profession. And I’m sure the phrase is as old as God Himself. So why do I have to be the guinea pig? Why do I have to be the one to show everyone that this is possible? Oh, God just what am I getting myself into?
A/N: This is my first Bible fic and it comes from the book of Hosea. I’m writing within the first three chapters. Here are the basics:
1. Hosea is a prophet that God tells to go and marry a prostitute.
2. And not just any prostitute, he’s to marry Gomer, the most well-known prostitute.
3. They married and she gave birth to three children and will eventually leave her husband.
4. Hosea divorces her and she goes back to what she knows.
5. He ends up providing for her, even when she is no longer his wife.
Those are the five facts based on the first three chapters. I'm just filling in the blanks. I've modernized it and romanticized it so it's set to present times, modern language, etc. Now there are all kinds of symbolic references to the Children of Israel with this book. I’m not going into all that. It’s actually spelled out in the rest of the book and there are many commentaries explaining what God was doing. I just want the chance to expound on it.
A/N2: Hosea’s thoughts in regular italics.
Chapter 1: The word from the Lord
Prophet and Minister Hosea sat at his desk, staring at his notes for the nth time. His eyes began to blur. He took his reading glasses off and rubbed his beyond tired eyes. He knew it wasn’t good for him, but he did it anyway. He sat back in his chair, resting his head on the headrest. Today had been a long day. He participated in three church services with a Sunday Dinner for the Hungry between two of them. Hosea stayed to clean up and took the extra food to a shelter. By the time he made it home, it was after 8 p.m. Then he sat down at his desk to work on the lesson for the following Wednesday night’s bible study.
The clock on his desk declared that it was well after midnight and he had been up since daybreak without his usual after dinner nap.
Can’t make sense of God’s word if I can’t stay awake to focus, he thought. He left his work on the desk, turned off the lamp and computer then made sure his house was secure for the night. After performing his nightly rituals, he prepared himself for his nightly prayers and meditation.
Well, maybe I’ll meditate tomorrow. I really should be alert when I do that. Minister Hosea knelt beside his bed, took a deep breath and began to pray.
“To my Father in heaven, I thank You for this day, this day that was not promised to me. I thank You for my life and the mission You have given me. I thank You for the strength and desire to carry out the mission. I thank You for all that You have done for our church and community. I thank You for guidance and wisdom. I thank You for love. Thank You for loving me, especially during those times that I don’t deserve it.
Lord, I thank You for the forgiveness of sins, mine and everyone else’s. Thank You for providing and giving us peace. Help us to pay attention to what You would have us do, what we need to do for the Kingdom. Help me to be better. Please help me to be a better servant, a better person. I give You all the praise and honor You are due, all glory to Your name. I love You will all my heart Lord. Amen.”
Hosea pulled back his covers and sat of the side of the bed for a few minutes. He set his alarm clock and plugged up his cell phone. He placed his glasses next to his watch on the night table and was about to get underneath the covers when he heard,
the voice. “Hosea?” It was crystal clear and distinct. And it wasn’t a whisper. This person sounded as if he were actually in the room with him.
“Wh...who’s there?” Hosea jumped up, looking around.
“After all this time, you are having a problem recognizing My voice? Not good Hosea, not good at all.”
“Lord?”
“Yes, Hosea. I saw you working on your lesson for Wednesday. I’m glad you stopped for the night. You are too tired and you need rest to focus.”
“Thank You, I guess. I’ve been having trouble focusing lately. That’s why I asked for help being better.”
“Hmmm, so I heard. After all this time, have you not realized that when you disobey me you have problems doing My work?” Hosea thought for a minute and began to pace.
“When did I last disobey You for You to punish me?”
“Several years ago, I gave you an assignment that you have not completed.” God’s voice seemed as if it was moving from one side of the bedroom to the other. “And the situation is getting worse. I need you to prepare yourself so I can fix it.”
Hosea turned to where he thought he heard the voice. “What situation? And why do You need me to fix it? You’re the Almighty; You can do any and everything.”
“But when you accepted your calling, you promised to do My bidding, My work. Are you going back on your word?”
“Oh no, Lord! Of course not. It’s just that I’m not sure what assignment You gave that I haven’t completed.” Confusion crept in.
“I told you to marry someone and you haven’t done it yet.”
“That again? I really don’t think she’s the right woman for me. Besides, I’ve stopped asking for a wife. I realize I’m not ready yet. So it’s sort of moot right now.”
“No it isn’t and I didn’t ask for your opinion on whether she was right for you or not. I told you to marry her and as long as the two of you are single, you are disobeying me.” Hosea hung his head in fatigue and defeat. He sighed and placed his hands on his waist in frustration.
“Lord, I’m really tired. Can we just talk about this during my mediation time?”
“Sure. Sleep, but you will obey Me. You can do it willingly or kicking and screaming, but you will obey Me.” And just like that, the room was silent. Hosea sighed again, turned off the bedside lamp and got underneath the covers. Sleep overtook him as soon as his head hit the pillow.
Hosea’s slumber was peaceful for the first few hours of the night. Then he began to dream of the people who lived in his city. They were running from God. That shouldn’t have bothered him; they were running from His word now. There were golden images and idols all over the city, some across from and even next door to churches. People were jumping from religion to religion, one belief to another or no belief at all. The word “whoredom” came to his mind. His tossing and turning made him uncomfortable in the bed.
Then the dream seemed to take a kinder, gentler turn. He saw three children, children that looked like him. But they were crying and he didn’t know why. He could see himself and that he had been crying as well, but there was no explanation for the tears. The city and outside lands were famished, people were starved and confused. They didn’t know where to turn. Hosea could hear himself saying to the people “Return to God. Repent of your ways; leave the idols, false gods and non-belief behind. He will restore the land and you unto Himself.”
He saw a woman. She was disheveled, dirty and barely had any clothes on. And the children he thought were his, favored her too. Was this their mother? Why was she dressed this way? Who is that man laughing at her but begging her to come back? This dream wasn’t making any sense to Hosea. A voice, like a whisper gave him an answer.
“She is your wife, Gomer. She is a prostitute. And yes, those were your children. I have plans for you and her. And the children of Israel. Don’t be afraid Hosea. You are strong enough for this task. If you weren’t I would have chosen someone else long ago. You have seen her picture around town so you know where to find her. Go, make her your wife so My will can be done and My word can be heard.” Hosea woke with a start just as his alarm clock was going off. He looked at it.
Morning already. After turning off the alarm he laid there a for a few minutes, remembering the dream- no nightmare- trying to make sense of it all. Maybe his morning meditation would help clear it up. But wasn’t it clear enough? He was to marry Gomer, a known poplar whore. Men lined up at the house she worked in for just mere moments with her. She was known to satisfy women and couples too.
Why her? She’d been doing it since she was 16 years old; it was all she knew.
How am I going to make a ho a housewife? I’ll be the laughing stock of, of…everybody. My friends, my family, the church. What will the pastor say? How will I explain it? The news will exploit it, make fun of it. No one will take my sermons and bible studies seriously. What am I getting into?