In the Bleak Midwinter

Renesmee's POV

I finally ran out of Carlisle and Esme's house after hearing soft music from Dad's old bedroom upstairs. I knew Momma was brooding, and I also knew that my father was currently berating my boyfriend for being spiritually bound to me. Typical brooding, angry vampire parents.

I pulled my car keys out of my pocket, thankful that Alice had taught me to drive and that Jasper had procured a fake driver's license for me a month ago. I still wasn't the world's greatest driver, but at least, unlike the rest of them, I went the speed limit.

I pulled into Billy's driveway and shut off the Land Rover. My dad's newest car, the latest extravagantly fast Porsche release, was parked already. I hoped that he wasn't upsetting Billy too much; the old man had grown so very frail in the last year. I sat in my car for a moment, trying to hear the conversation inside the house, angry that my hearing wasn't as astute as my parents'. Sighing, I jumped out of the car and walked briskly up to the door.

I was shocked at what I heard.

“Jacob,” Dad was saying, “Believe me, I understand the pull. I have been reading your mind about it for the last seven and a half years. I know it's involuntary, and I know I was really angry about it at first. But now I see... the undying devotion. I would be stupid as a father to want any less for my daughter. Ness, you can come in.”

I rolled my eyes. Why did his ability have to be so annoying?

I stepped into Billy's house and nodded to everyone present. Jacob was at my side instantly, his arm wrapped protectively around my waist. I saw the strain in my father's eyes but knew he was speaking the truth.

“Edward,” Jacob said, his voice hoarse with emotion, “I never meant to hurt anyone, least of all Bella. But she chose you ages ago, and, well, Nessie chose me, even if it wasn't consciously.”

Dad nodded and cleared his throat. His voice was suddenly dark. “Jacob,” he said quietly, “I have no problem with you being in love with my daughter. I have no problem with you kissing her. But you need to promise me right here and now that you will not do... do THAT to her again until there is a wedding ring on her finger and you've both said 'I do'.”

Beside me, Jacob nodded his assent. “I promise,” he vowed, “Not again until we're married.”

I rolled my eyes again and my father whirled on me. “Your mother waited. I waited. You can wait too, Ness. Make it official and I'll stop caring. And, please, both of you... try to think of something else... ANYTHING else... when I'm around.”

With that, he was gone, out the door and zooming down the road in his ostentatious car.

Jacob took my hands in his, the size and warmth of his hands overwhelming mine. He gave me a look that needed no words, and he read my memories through the skin contact. I looked mournfully at him and showed him my mother's reaction to the realization that I was in love with her best friend, her Jacob, and I showed him my own words pleading with my parents for understanding.

Jacob pulled me by the hand into his tiny bedroom and shut the door. “Nessie,” he said quietly, “You know I love you so very much. I have since you were born. I can't help the way things have gone.” He plopped me down on his bed and knelt before me. “Will you marry me as soon as possible, so that I can be the loving and responsible husband I need to be?” His eyes were imploring. I grinned widely and kissed him in response, nodding.

“Of course I will,” I said, my voice a mere whisper.

“I'll get you a ring,” he assured me.

“That's not necessary,” I responded, but his look was insistent. I nodded my capitulation.

He sat beside me on the bed and we both fell slowly onto our backs, lying side by side. The warmth that radiated from his dark, smooth skin comforted me, just like it always had. I sighed silently and grasped his hand. I closed my eyes, and together we relieved the golden memory of last night.

It was snowing outside, and I could just barely see him in the darkness. I could smell him long before his dark silhouette was visible through the opaque veil of snowflakes that were relentlessly covering my meadow in a white blanket. I shivered ever so slightly, my human vulnerabilities betraying me. Fortunately, I saw that he had a thick quilt tucked under his arm. And, if nothing else, his body would be impossibly warm.

“Nessie,” he murmured through the darkness. “Are you sure?”

I nodded once, curtly, and pursed my lips. Of course I was ready. I had steeled myself for every detail of this experience for days now, struggling to control my thoughts whenever my father was within mind-shot.

He laid the quilt down on the snow-covered grass, but the flakes continued to fall. A winter breeze rustled the needles of the evergreens around us, and he huddled me close to him on the fabric surface.

He was so warm and tender, his skin so much softer than my own. I sighed happily into the crook between his shoulder and his bare chest, and smiled.

“I brought the... er... protection,” he managed to say, and I could imagine his cheeks flushing with embarrassment. Through my touch, he saw the memory of me overhearing Carlisle and my father discussing their fears that someday I might become pregnant.

“Edward, I just have no way of really knowing if any of that works correctly, but it's really best not to take chances. Alice said there's a possibility of some sort of shape-shifter/vampire/human hybrid child, and we can't let that happen,” Carlisle had warned. So I'd researched condoms and told Jacob to buy them, and Alice said that that vision had disappeared completely.

“I'll be careful,” he promised, “and gentle, though I know you're strong. I just don't trust the latex,” he chuckled under his breath.

He kissed the top of my head, and I tipped my smiling face up to his. He pressed his lips to mine warmly and I felt his tongue sneak into my mouth. I embraced it willingly with my own, allowing our tongues to dance wildly and passionately in the heat. I clutched his face in my palms and moaned into his kiss.

He was pulling off his cut-off jean shorts and kicking them powerfully away. I hoped absentmindedly that he would be able to find them later, but the majority of my brain couldn't care less. His large hands were tangled in my curly hair, grasping my scalp warmly as we continued to kiss deeply.

“Jake,” I cried, my words stifled by his frantic mouth. I reached a hand down tentatively and felt the heat emitted by the throbbing between his thighs. I moaned again, this time with pure longing. Jacob wrenched one of his hands from my hair and reached over for a wrapped condom beside him. As he focused both his hands and eyes on unwrapping it, I buried my face in his neck, breathing in his warm scent deliriously, my passion now completely unrestrained. I was nearly sobbing into his skin, and I removed all of my clothes so quickly that, even to me, it seemed that I was instantaneously nude.

I knelt beside him as he rolled the condom onto his large cock, dark and pulsing. I cupped his balls in my hand and marveled at their size. I gently stroked the area around his inner thighs, his lower stomach, and the sharp lines of his pelvis, and his eyes rolled back in his head. After he regained his composure, he grinned up at me. “Climb on, Nessie,” he invited, his words laced with adoration.

I straddled him and gently lowered myself onto his length. It hurt worse than I'd expected, but I hissed through the pain. He grasped my waist, his eyes riddled with concern.

“Stop if it's hurting!” he cried.

“It'll just hurt a little; it'll get better in a second,” I tried to sound convincing, as if I knew what the hell I was talking about. I continued to lower myself onto him, and after raising myself up and lowering myself down again, slowly, as if I were on a sort of lazy carousel, the pain receded. I was flooded with pleasure, and my carousel accelerated.

I leaned forward, falling onto my hands for support. My breasts hung over his face and he reached a hand up to fondle them as I pulled him in and out of me at a forty-five degree angle. The rubbing against what I assumed was the rumored “g-spot” was unbearable, and I shook on my own arms, barely able to hold myself up. His warm hand continued to fondle me, and then there was a sharp “smack” on my bum.

“Ah!” I cried out, but the spank was not painful. It was purely playful in nature, and I wanted more. “Again!” I gasped.

As my body moved faster and faster against his lubricated length, his groping of my chest grew more frenetic, and the spanks came more frequently, smacking against my skin, bringing blood to the surface until I could feel its heat.

I couldn't take it anymore. I collapsed onto him, my body spasming in a way I'd never felt before. It was as though I'd been swept underwater by a powerful wave, and there was sloshing and jostling around me from every conceivable angle. I could feel my muscles contracting, a shock of pleasure coursing through my veins every time they did. I could hear my heart pounding frantically, trying desperately to escape my chest.

I looked at Jacob's face from where I'd collapsed. He was moving me know, crushing my pelvis against his with his powerful hands. His eyes were clenched, and so were his teeth. He was gasping and moaning, and I half expected him to howl. From somewhere inside the condom, I could feel warm spurts of liquid leaving his body, but not making contact with mine. I wished the barrier wasn't there at all.

I stroked his chest gently with my hand as he came down from outer space, or wherever he'd been during the culmination of his potent arousal. He grasped my hand and shuddered as he saw my first-hand account of my own orgasm. He looked deeply into my eyes as I moved my body reluctantly off of his. The condom wrapper had been specific: remove the condom before the penis softens. It was such a shame, though, to have to break contact. And still the snow was falling around us, landing on his hot skin and melting immediately.

“I love you,” I mouthed, unable to find my voice at all.

His eyes returned the promise.

Lying on Jacob's bed in Billy's house, I was shocked out of my reverie by his carnal vocalization. I'd just been lying on the bed, peacefully reviewing the first time he'd made love to me, and Jacob had masturbated through the whole thing. I almost laughed at the sight of him lying there, his hand still grasping his cock, his stomach splattered in warm, white liquid. His breath was fast and heavy. I grinned, satisfied that I could please him so greatly with just a memory.