The Brother I Never Knew

The Brother I Never Knew

Chapter 31

fusedtwilight: Sorry it took so long to update, this was a tough chapter to write and i wanted to do a good job of the Cullen's getting into Jamie's head. I was going to make it longer but i decided to split it into two chapters. And before you read let me say one thing, i am not a therapist and i have no experiance with any mential conditions or disorders so if i wrote anything inacurate about any mental conditions remember i am not well schooled in that field. A big thanks to the readers and my beta animehirlkiki.

Leah P.O.V

Jamie kept his word.

In return for not telling Sam we kept quiet about the drugs. He gave us the names of all the drug dealers in the Port who were dealing. I passed the info onto Charlie. He didn't give me any crap about my source and I was grateful. With the names he will be able to work with the police in Port Angeles to take care of the dealers and soon Forks will be drug free again.

I didn't tell Sam about what Jamie and those kids did either, but it's only a matter of time before word of four Quileutes beating up dealers reach his ears and then the shit will really hit the fan. I wonder what Jamie will do when he can't bargain or manipulate his way out of this.

Seth is still mad at me, he is civil when he talks to me but he is keeping his distance. The problem with being a second in command is having to make the hard choices and sometimes the people you care about might be hurt by those decisions. But I am the pack beta if I am to be a second I need to be tough and willing to suffer the consequences. That doesn't make me feel any better about it though. For now I will just give Seth some space and let him cool off. Seth doesn't hold grudges that's more my thing.

I'm still looking after the pups, we are making some progress in getting them to control their emotions so they will stop facing, but it is a painfully slow process. Until they can control their emotions and stop spontaneously phasing they can't go back to La Push. The threat of exposure is too great. And the fact many of their parents don't want them back. Sad but true. One of the pup's parents actually abandoned him; yep they packed their stuff and left La Push without telling anyone where they were going. Days like that make me question humanity.

I convinced Sam to let Carlisle try and help Jamie with his condition. How did I do that you ask? Simple I used Emily. I went to her first and told her my plan. She agreed, she cares for Jamie and his well being and if having a bunch of vampires get inside his head will help then good. It only took us thirty minutes of arguing with Sam to get him to cave in and agreed.

I talked to Emily about her and Sam's wedding, she showed me the dress she got for me and Jamie was right, it does go well with my eyes. I will still be the maid of honor. Why would I put myself through such a painful thing? Because I need it. I still love Sam. I have tried to hate him and that worked well, but inside all that hate there is still love. I can't move on if I love him. So this will help me sever that piece that is still clinging to him. Maybe pain is what I need to get Sam out of my life. Maybe pain will give me the strength to escape.

Pain is a great teacher after all...shit now I sound like Jamie.

We sat in Carlisle's study.

The drive over had been silent. I said nothing and Jamie said nothing as we drove. When we arrived we got out of the car and walked up to the house and were welcomed in by Esme.

She told us Carlisle and the others were waiting for us in his study, so we walked up their and found Carlisle, Edward and Jasper waiting for us. We sat down on the love seat while Carlisle and the others sat on the couch. I noticed it was new furniture and figured Alice had gotten into Carlisle's study and figured Alice did some redecorating, she could never remain idle.

"Now Jamie before we begin I want you to know anything we discuss will not be revealed to anyone," Carlisle said.

Carlisle was being all professional about this; he was a doctor after all. Edward and Jasper were here because a telepath and an empath would be good at therapy. They were even properly trained; they had gotten many diplomas in the many colleges they went to that dealt with human psychology, so technically they were trained professionals. But I had to wonder if those fancy degrees would help them deal with the psyche of a sociopath werewolf.

"Thanks again for this Carlisle." I said.

"My pleasure." He smiled.

"Can I ask a question before we begin?" Jamie asked. Speaking for the first time since we had driven together. "I understand why you and Edward are here, but why is Jasper?"

"My gift will allow me to gauge your emotional response and state. It will help us understand how you respond to this and future sessions better." Jasper said.

I noticed him and Jamie had something in common they both had the same kind of face, blank, neutral. Jasper had decades to make that face, Jamie was born with it. I wonder if that was why they had Jasper here. Could Jasper's own bloody past help with these sessions?

I looked at Edward and he gave me a little nod. So I was right.

"Can you feel anything from me right now?" Jamie asked.

Jasper frowned. "I sense curiosity, calm, and desire."

"Desire?"

"Yes, but it's fading in and out, you have a really powerful desire for something that I confess I can not tell what. But what is weirder is that it is a powerful urge but you are capable of holding it back."

"How about we start from the beginning before we get there yet." Carlisle said. "Leah if you could give us some privacy?"

"Sure thing, I'll be downstairs in case you need me." I got up and turned to Jamie. "Be good, don't start anything."

"I'll be on my best behavior," He smiled. I wonder if that is the smile the spider gave the fly when it invited the fly in to its web.

I headed for the door and I remembered what Jasper had to say about what Jamie was feeling. Curiosity was one of the reason's Jamie wanted to come. For a werewolf he had an unnatural curiosity for vampires. Jamie was like a scientist who had discovered a new species and wanted to study it. He was supposed to be here to get help, but I'm sure while he is here he plans on studying the Cullens and learning everything about them. I guess he has gotten bored of humans and werewolves were old news. Vampires were in for him.

The second emotion desire was harder to place. But I was fairly certain it was him fighting the imprint. I wonder how he has been able to stay sane while trying to block that all powerful instinct. Then I remember his condition. Isn't sociopathy a form of insanity?

Edward P.O.V

I watched as Leah left the room. I heard her thoughts and I had to agree.

From what I heard from Jamie's thoughts he is indeed curious of us. All he has heard of us are the legends of the Quileutes and the memories of his pack. He wanted to learn more about us. To study us up close and personal. We were new and unknown and we interested him, which was all the reason he needed.

But there was a more practical side. He knew we were natural enemies and truce or no truce he wanted to learn our behavior and strengths and weaknesses should the day ever come when he must fight us. He wasn't planning on attacking us, but should the day ever come when there would be a fight he wanted to be prepared.

Also I believe Leah was right Jamie was still fighting the power of the imprint. I have been around imprinted werewolves, I know the power it holds and the fact a new wolf could do the impossible and shrug it off made me curious too.

I confess Carlisle wasn't the only one who was looking forward to these sessions. Carlisle wanted to help, but mine and Jasper's motivations were more like Jamie's. He was something new for us to study and we knew a sociopathic werewolf was a dangerous thing indeed. So Jamie would not only be the scientist he would also be the specimen under the microscope.

It had been so long since Jasper or I had found such an interesting subject to use our powers on. Sure both he and I had dealt with the sociopath before, but Jamie was-forgive the pun-a new breed.

I was frustrated I wasn't able to get more from him, he wasn't like Bella he didn't have full immunity to my power. He was so focused, not a single thought was wasted. Most people spend their lives wasting their thoughts on trivial matters. Some were more focused, but Jamie's mind was so sharp I had to put more effort into reading him and even then all I got was small sentences or words.

I decided to focus more on his mind, usually I try to ignore the voices of others minds but I was trying to help Jamie. So I did something I haven't done in a long time, I went further into a mind then I ever have.

I can control how far into a mind I can go. I can't read memories like Aro or share my thoughts/memories like my daughter. But when I go into a persons mind at a certain point it's like I become them. The best I can describe it is I see/hear/smell/feel/taste everything they do as well as hear their inner monologues.

Most people would think the mind of a sociopath is like a little corner of hell. But that's not true, the minds of a sociopath are quiet...peaceful. It's a psychopath that can be real disturbing. When I was younger I rebelled from Carlisle and his way of thinking. I hunted monsters, human monsters and drank their blood. But during my hunting I was able to get an inside look into the minds of human monsters.

Sociopaths I noticed are like creatures of instinct. They are like predators that are capable of human thoughts. Only they are not bound by conscience or morality. They aren't really complicated, in their world two plus two equals four, and so on and so forth. They are highly logical and every action has a purpose. But they are still capable of doing monstrous things and feeling no regret. I don't envy them for all though they have an inner peace so many crave, it's like that lack of passion leaves a void that can not be filled up. Their minds are like caves, dark, cold, empty.

Psychopaths are different. Psychopaths are like creatures of desire. But there is darkness in them, it's like a newborn when they smell blood all forms of rational thought leave them and they become obsessed with gaining what they want. But like sociopaths they can appear to be normal every day citizens but they have a trigger that brings forth their inner demon. A trigger can be anything. A person, a place, a word, a date. These are the murders and rapists. Psychopaths are more frightening than a sociopath. Just leave a sociopath alone and he or she will leave you alone. But a psychopath will seek you out and use you for their own amusement. Their minds are like caves; except there is something in there you can't see. Something you don't want to see.

While I was exploring Jamie's mind I made a most disturbing discovery. Their was something in the cave. Something animalistic. I focused on this new discovery and made a shocking find. The thing in his cave was his wolf! Jamie and his wolf were two separate entities!

This was strange none of the other wolves had this problem; it was like the wolf instincts had bled into their human minds. But Jamie was his own mind as was his wolf. I then came to a two realizations, this was why Jamie was able to break so many rules, why he was able to hide his thoughts so efficiently, why he could reject imprinting. There were two minds in one body, but they were like two sides of the same coin so Jamie was still able to phase. It was like he could have all the benefits but not worry about the draw backs.

The second realization that was that Jamie was in control now, but I sensed that this coin could be flipped so heads could become tails. It was possible for the wolf to take control, but since their minds weren't properly melded the wolf would act like any wolf.

Jamie wasn't just a sociopath. He was a sociopath werewolf with multiple personality disorder.

Will wonders never cease?

Jamie P.O.V

I observed the Cullens in front of me.

I watched as they breathed, blinked, even adjusted themselves every so often so they could get more comfortable.

I knew what they were doing was pointless; vampires don't need to do any of that. I knew from what Sam had told me about vampires what they were capable of. But I have to admit there were some aspects of the stories he told me I had to wonder what was fact and what was fiction. I mean it was more then a known fact werewolves and vampires didn't get along.

I also had to stay here because of the deal I made with Leah. I wasn't too worried about these therapy sessions, my mother had sent me too when I was younger so any questions the doctor came up with should be easy to pass.

The problem was Edward and Jasper. Edward I might be able to avoid since I seem to be good hiding my thoughts from the pack mind, but Jasper might be more difficult.

I was hoping to gain some experience from this as well. Vampires are interesting beings, the fact they have these powers and have fewer weaknesses then werewolves definitely puts them way up on top of the food chain. Even werewolves need to eat and sleep, and even we get tired after a while.

And since it was my job to kill them, observing the Cullens might prove to be useful on the battlefield. I don't plan on killing them, so why study them to learn how to kill them? Because they can kill me and should the day ever come when we must fight to the death I want to be ready. It might happen it might not, better safe then sorry.

"So Jamie any questions before we begin?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes, can you act more like vampires?" I asked.

They looked surprised at that request. "May I ask why?" Carlisle asked.

"I know you don't require oxygen, you don't need to move, and you don't need to do any of the things humans do. I want to see how you act when humans aren't around." I said.

"Haven't you friends told you how we are?" Jasper asked.

"They told me some things, none of it pleasant." I smiled. "But lets say I like to see for myself if something is true or not."

They looked at each other then they stared at me. Just stared, I realized they stopped breathing and after a few moments I saw they were no longer blinking. They were like statues, statues come to...life? I wanted to see more. I wanted to watch them run, watch them fight, watch them kill. I wanted to know everything about them. There were things about vampires I could not ask Sam, after all he hated the Cullen's and hate will make you blind.

"Impressive, is it uncomfortable not breathing?" I asked.

"Not at all, in fact we find it odd to breathe." Carlisle smiled.

"If it's not too much to ask may I observe you when you hunt?" I asked.

"May I ask why?" Carlisle asked.

"Because you interest me."

Carlisle looked at me puzzled, then he looked over to Edward and Edward said.

"He is curious Carlisle that's all. He truly wants to observe us hunt because he thinks he can learn something from it."

"And what do you hope to learn?" Jasper asked.

I found myself liking Jasper. He was hard to read. Like me his face was a perfect mask of nothing. He must be really good at poker. Normally I was good at reading people by simply observing their movements or facial expressions, but Jasper was perfect at keeping his emotions locked up.

"What does a scientist hope to learn from studying a new kind of animal?" I asked back.

"You have to forgive us, none of the wolves ever showed this amount of interest in us before, we are simply...surprised by your interest in us." Carlisle said.

"Yes well the others grew up hearing of how evil and dangerous your family is I was not." I stated a fact. It was true, I noticed that the entire tribe of La Push had some superstitions of the Cullens, which was funny seeing how they were unaware a large portion of there children were monsters themselves. When the others became wolves they remembered the story's they were told growing up, it is only natural for them to feel nothing but hate for the Cullens. It was a nice little way for them to blame someone for their condition.

Personally if I was them I would be thanking the Cullen's. If vampires didn't exist then they would just be humans. It figures they go on about how cool it is to be a werewolf and how amazing imprinting is but yet they still hate the Cullen's for their loss of humanity. Idiots. As if humanity is so easily lost.

"You also want to learn how to kill us more efficiently." Edward said.

Carlisle looked shocked, and Jasper got a hostile look on his face.

"Yes," I agreed. "But not because I mean you harm, because it is my job to kill your kind, the time may come when I must face one of your kind one on one and by observing your family I might learn how to better fight."

"He is being truthful, but I am sensing he is keeping more from us." Jasper said.

"He wants to study as individuals in case there is ever a fight." Edward said.

"But why? We mean you and your tribe no harm." Carlisle asked me.

"Because you are still my natural enemy. And I know that some humans blood is more irresistible then others for you. Tell me Carlisle if you or one of yours met one and had a little...slip what do you think the wolves will do?"

"Jacob has imprinted on Nessie, they won't hurt us." Jasper said.

"I know the rules, it says you can't hurt another wolves imprint, it doesn't say anything about the imprints family."

A pregnant silence filled the room. Jasper was back to his poker face, Edward was frowning, and Carlisle was no longer smiling.

"Jacob's pack may be more friendly, but Sam's pack is still waiting for the day, in fact some are even eagerly waiting for it."

"But why?" Carlisle asked.

"They were taught to hate you, they hate you for making them monsters, and because that is what we were made to do, to kill you," I said.

"Amazing," Jasper said. "He feels nothing right now, no regret, no guilt, nothing. He feels not confliction about what he is saying at all."

"I'm just stating the fact is all, I'm not going to sit here and tell you sweet lies. I don't believe in lying, it is much easier to tell the truth instead of wasting time and energy in making a lie." I said.

I watched as the info I gave them took root, I wonder if they knew how much Sam's pack really hated them. I had actually caught some of the newer wolves having fantasies were they attacked and killed all the Cullens. It was nothing really, just some kids daydreaming of being heroes. Dumb kid stuff. But there was a danger in those fantasies. It would be easy for someone to come along and take all that negative energy and focus it into something more lethal.

"If you intend to use this information you wish to gather to one day hurt my family then why should I let you watch us hunt?" Carlisle asked.

"Because like I said I mean you no harm, but there is a possibility that one day there could be a fight. Or maybe I have to kill one of you to save a human who was unfortunate enough to smell too good for you."

"So because there is a possibility of something that there is no guaranty of happening you wish to be ready for it." Jasper said. "You really are a sociopath."

"Then let me sweeten the deal, let me observe you and I will promise to never tell anyone what I observe, and I will be your spy."

Another pregnant pause. "Why would we need a spy?" Carlisle asked.

"Because my brother is still your enemy. He still blames you for what happened with Leah. He once told me 'If it wasn't for those leeches Leah would have been happy.' All the suffering the wolves have gone through he blames on all vampires. If the treaty is ever dissolved he will lead the charge."

"But we have Jake, he keeps us informed." Edward said.

"Only because he has imprinted on your daughter. And what makes you think Sam tells Jake everything; he thinks Jake's loyalties are compromised because of your daughter. Which is true to a degree. There are too many wolves in La Push. There are too many idea's running around for one wolf to control. Sam can't keep watch over all the wolves because they won't talk to him. But I hear things Carlisle. They say things in front of me because they know there is no love lost between us. Let me study you and your family as you will study me and I will let you know when things are getting risky with Sam's pack. I can give you a heads up should something happen that requires your immediate attention."

"You think Sam will attack us?" Jasper asked.

"I think he is honorable enough he will wait for you to 'Make the first move.' As they say. But I think that the younger wolves are too angry and bitter to care for treaties and right and wrong."

"You also want to make a treaty with us because you want connections." Edward said.

"Yes it's true, I'm not just doing this out of the kindness of my heart, you have a powerful family Carlisle, and should the day ever come when my welcome is worn out of La Push I would like to think I can depend on you for help. It is a beneficial relationship you see we both get something out of this. I will tell you all the secrets Sam keeps from Jacob and warn you of any danger coming from La Push, and in return I can depend on you for shelter and protection."

"Even if I wanted to make such a deal the pack would learn, that would destroy any vestiges of trust between us." Carlisle said.

I laughed. "There is no trust between your family and Sam, Jacob sure him you can trust. Remember how readily he was to kill your unborn niece and step-daughter?" I asked. And besides I can shield my thoughts."

"What exactly do you hope to learn from us? Besides how best to kill us?" Carlisle asked seriously.

"People talk about humanity all the time, there are countless documents and poems about what makes us human, religion is a way we try to tell ourselves what is right and wrong by convincing ourselves that some great power judges us. Some think it is something you are born with; some think it must be earned. It's funny even the wolves think they are more human then your family will ever be." I smiled "What I'm trying to say is I know what it is like to have some one call you a monster because you are what you had no control over what you are." I put a sad face on, even though I felt no sorrow for my past but I needed to play the sympathy card. "I know I can be monstrous Carlisle and no amount of prayer or medicine will help make me more human. I hope that by watching you vampires maybe I can find that abstract line between human...and monster."

Carlisle looked at me sympathetically. My sad face must have worked better then I thought but Jasper cut in. "Don't let him fool you Carlisle he feels no sorrow. He is just trying to gain sympathy."

So much for the sympathy card.

"Okay fine," I said rolling my eyes. "But I am serious about the humanity bit."

Carlisle looked at Jasper and he nodded. "Okay very well, in exchange for your services we will allow you to study us as we will study you. And we will also be there to provide any assistance you may require in the future."

"We have a deal then." I smiled.

"We will continue the therapy, if you want to learn humanity then I suggest you dedicate yourself to these sessions, and we will inform Jake of this deal," Carlisle said sternly.

"As you wish, so what first?" I asked.

"Well how about we talk about...your mother?" Carlisle asked.

Oh boy this will be fun.

fusedtwilight: Does Jamie know how to make an oppertunity or what? And it turns out being a wolf has made him more mental then ever, next chapter the Cullens dig deeper into Jamies mind, but are they prepared for what they may find? And what plan has Sam put into motion and will it ruin Leah's plans for Jamie? Please review.