Demon Song

********Chapter 6: Attraction, Lies and Video Tapes********


I ran then, ran almost all the way to Seattle. Usually running calmed me, allowing my mind to go blank as I allowed myself to be given up to physical sensation. Only when I hunted was I a less cerebral creature, because it was then that I immersed myself in my heightened senses and instincts. Emmett always tells me that I think too much. I usually tell him that he thinks too little. Perhaps we are both right, but Emmett is a happier man than I am, so perhaps he’s got everything figured out already.

Emmett of course, was not alone. I supposed that I was not either, seeing as I was constantly surrounded by those who loved me. But I could not escape the fact that when they disappeared, pairing off into their private havens, I was left alone.

Was it loneliness that drew me to Bella? I did not think so, but perhaps my solitude had opened my eyes to what might have been. What might have been mine, what I suddenly wanted. I yearned for things I had never known I could desire. Suddenly, longings were being brought to life within me that were both uncomfortable and yet undeniably alluring. Things I might have had… If things had been different. If I was not a monster, and she was not… human.

As I stared out over the city of Seattle, I wondered what she was doing at that moment. Probably sleeping, since it was two a.m. Most of the humans would be sleeping now. By the time I left, Rose and Emmett were already engaged in each other, while the looks Alice and Jasper were giving each other could practically ignite the room around them. Even Carlisle and Esme had been eyeing each other speculatively as I slipped out the door.

There were times when it was very difficult to live like a monk when I was surrounded by three very passionate bonded pairs.

But it was madness to think of Bella that way when every moment I was around her my throat burned with thirst and my muscles tightened with the tension I felt as I battled the monster inside of me. Had I been human, Bella would have been the girl I might have pursued. But I was not human, not even close.

Still, I could not prevent dangerous fantasies from forming.


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The next day at lunch, I surprised myself when I sat down at a table away from my siblings. Rosalie rolled her eyes, Emmett laughed, Jasper merely looked incredulous. And Alice… Well her reaction bothered me most of all. She gave me a sly smile and winked.

Unfortunately, that was all she was giving up. She started recalling a particularly naughty strip tease that Jasper had performed for her one night and I skipped out of her head as quickly as I could. There were some things that were very difficult to forget, no matter how hard one tried. She stuck her tongue out at me and I could not help but laugh. Leave it to Alice to make me laugh when I felt as if my world was crumbling down around me.

Then she walked in. Bella Swan. Even her name was graceful, bringing to mind a tranquil lake and a gentle spring day. Of course, Bella herself was less than graceful, in motion at least. She tripped twice on her way to the lunch line and then almost dropped her tray. I had to repress my laughter because I had a feeling that it would not endear me to her.

Did I want her to think kindly of me?

I was very much afraid that I did. She glanced at the table where the rest of the Cullens pretended to eat and her expression fell. Then Jess elbowed her. “I see Edward Cullen thinks he’s too good to even sit with his brothers and sisters.”

Bella’s eyes flashed in the direction Jess pointed and she smiled widely as she saw me. I hated the joy that surged within me at that smile. I pushed out a chair with my foot, extending an obvious invitation. To my surprise, Bella didn’t even excuse herself from Jessica’s company; instead she walked straight toward me.

The tray almost fell yet again and I wondered how soon my father would be seeing her in the emergency room. As much as I worried about that possibility, I envied him the opportunity to touch her, even as innocently as that.

She sat down in the chair and settled her tray safely on the table. “Hi,” she murmured, a tantalizing blush firing her cheeks.

Ah, the heat and the fragrance were almost too much. But I swallowed the venom pooling in my mouth and took a deep breath. My throat exploded into flames and my head filled with an exquisite awareness of her. “Hello,” I replied when I had gotten myself under control. She probably noticed no delay at all, but I could feel it. It pounded inside of me, this need for her.

Bella opened her soda without saying anything else, but I heard her heart hammering wildly in her chest. I was almost overcome with a desire to press my ear to that thundering rhythm, and despaired that it was not safe for me to do so.

“I’ve been wondering,” I said, and the words were only a lie by their timing. “I don’t know the area well, and I wanted to take a trip to Port Angeles.” I smiled at her, letting our eyes meet for a long moment. I knew how to be charming when I wanted; it was a survival skill for our kind. Yet I had never yearned to charm someone as much as I longed for it now. “Would you go with me? To give me the lay of the land, so to speak?”

Her heart sputtered and stalled. I found that reaction fascinating even as I wondered at its cause. Could she, impossible as it seemed, be attracted to me? I hardly dared to hope.

Her eyelashes fluttered down, hiding those intriguing eyes from me. I hated to lose sight of them; they truly were the windows to her soul, and her mind. Secrets lingered there, secrets I wanted to uncover. “All right,” she answered softly. “When?” Bella glanced up at me then, flushing scarlet yet again. I swallowed hard.

“This weekend?” I suggested.

“This weekend then,” Bella agreed. The bell rang and she shot to her feet. “I’ll see you in biology.”

I watched her walk away, mesmerized by the gentle sway of her hips.


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When the class saw the biology teacher dragging out the television and video player, an excited buzz filled the room. The lights suddenly went out. Soon a dim flickering from the television filled the room. I glanced beside me to see a stunned expression on Bella’s face. I felt quite certain that if she could see me, a similar expression would be on mine.

Every cell of my body was painfully and exquisitely aware of the girl beside me. Her heat radiated out toward me, luring me in. My body tensed with a strange hunger. Not a thirst for her blood, but something much older, even more primal. In this darkness, my mind turned in directions that were not safe for either of us.

I wanted to touch, to claim.

I had sudden visions of inviting her into my room, letting soft music fill the room as I led her to a bed, where I would gently press her beneath me and then I would-

I barely stifled the groan that threatened to break free of my control.

My hands trembled as I tucked them under my arms, the only way I could keep from reaching out for her, from caressing the soft, pink flesh of her cheeks, the full lips that were parted and moist as if anticipating my kiss.

The movie dragged on, and a thousand decadent fantasies filled my head, making my body ache in ways that were unfamiliar and exciting. Never had I WANTED as fiercely as I wanted the girl who sat at my side.

I did not have the right to covet her, but I did.

I wanted to claim her in ways that both shamed and thrilled me.

Would I be strong enough to resist?

And what would happen if I wasn’t?