What would you think of me, my lost love? Would you consider what I have done a crime against all that we were? Marcus wondered late one night as he watched over the sleeping woman listening as her heart strained against the growing sickness in her body to beat reasonably normally.
He’d spent a fair amount of time with the young woman and loathed each minute because not only because of the scent of her blood calling to him, but also the lingering bitter tang of her sickness mingling in the air nearest to her skin.
It was those things and it was more, it was the hours spent talking with Cara about her wishes and dreams – playing sometimes the “what if” game that he had overhead Edward playing with Nessie with Cara just to see what she had liked, what she would have done differently, and more, he had done so in order to discover what she wanted even in a hypothetical sense out of her life.
It was late and he looked up over the book when he heard her sharp intake of breath chancing the touch of his fingers against the feverish forehead again, tilting his head so that his dark hair curled around his ear slightly, a worried look on his face.
“Its fine, nothing I haven’t lived with before,” she whispered her voice hoarse from lack of use, “how long have I been asleep?”
“The better part of the last three days,” Marcus answered gently letting his fingers brush the dark hair back away from her forehead, “You should drink something, at least.” He said reaching for the cup with ice water and a straw kept fresh by the bed. It took a bit of concentration to ignore the slow pulse under his fingers as he helped her lift her head to drink a few small sips.
At this rate of deterioration, another moon perhaps. He thought with a slight frown as his fingers slid from under her head to let it rest on the pillow.
Marcus watched her drift back into sleep and jumped as his cell phone sprang to life in his pocket, lifting it with an elegant hand he arched a brow reading the name before clicking the ‘answer’ button. “Good evening, Jane.” He said quietly into the receiver.
“You have to get them out of Forks.” The panic and urgency was in Jane’s voice as she hissed into her phone, “I will explain if I get there in time, Master Marcus its bad.” The connection died as he began to ask what was wrong.
Jane was never anything but unwavering and fearless – what could have upset her enough to call him with a thirty-second warning that she had to know there was no way to convince the others to leave.
Reluctantly he walked to the door his phone still in hand opening it he blinked at the pocket-sized dark haired vampire looking up at him her golden eyes reflecting his concern back to him.
“We need to talk.” She said simply before walking into the room and closing the door.
***
Reluctantly Marcus traded his seat with Kaashaa who carried with her both of her twins, already the size of toddlers each one and talking in short single-word sentences. He had to leave, for his meeting and it was not one he looked forward to – meeting with a member of the White Mountain Clan was unnerving enough even for a Volturi leader but to meet with Theron himself was not high on his list of favorite tasks, less so after the near-destruction of a wedding day of the elder Vampire’s daughter.
Almost as unnerving was the fact that Elyshia had opted to accompany him. Something about the woman was disturbing – and that she was most definitely not entirely sane was not lost on him. Crossed he had seen – Sirena had made that lesson abundantly clear that Elyshia was not one to forgive…or forget.
“Relax he doesn’t bite – often.” Elyshia grinned as she shook her dark hair out of her long coat before putting her sunglasses on her head completely relaxed at the idea of meeting with the Vampire that had, he knew raised her.
Theron of White Mountain Clan was a slightly built man, his hair was long, slightly curling mane that swayed when he turned at the sound of footsteps welcoming the loose embrace of his elder daughter, adopted or not the fondness was there, a stab of envy at the easy closeness cutting Marcus slightly as he eyed Theron evenly. “We stand on the brink of war – my brothers are coming.” He began with an uneasy look – the agelessness to the Vampire’s eyes was unnerving, but not less than the fact that unlike his own faintly burgundy eyes the gaze was dark like the night around them and seemed to see to his soul. “They are going to try again to tear down the walls of the Cullen Coven, and then I think they are going to set their sights on yours.”
Theron smiled his long canines twinkling in the dim light, “They are not the first to come after my mate and I, they will not be the last.” He said looking at Marcus, “Why are you telling me of this?”
“Because I believe, in this case they are grasping at straws for reasons to continually complicate the lives of your daughter and her family.” He replied quietly shivering at the things Alice had gleaned as possible future events. “They mean to take Emily from Kaashaa for a start, and,” he hesitated glancing at Elyshia who seemed unperturbed at the part they had discussed on the way to Theron to avoid surprises. “Moreover they seek to cripple the Keeper in anyway they can, including taking Kaashaa to eternal death.” He finished meeting Theron’s darkening gaze that then focused on Elyshia.
“You have seen as well?” he asked pointedly tilting her chin to see the woman’s eyes as well. At the subtle nod and the flash of Sight in her gaze he frowned deeply, “And what defense do we have against this.” He inquired.
“Only that they do not know that they have a traitor in their midst.” Marcus answered, “While Jane has proven...unreliable in the last few months for either side Aro will always welcome any who offer their services to the Volturi, she has always been closest to me… “ he hesitated as if searching for a word, “almost as if her loyalty wasn’t so much the Volturi itself, but to me.”
“A personal debt or loyalty is hard pressed to shatter, even with Chelsea on Aro’s side.” Theron nodded thinking over the news.
***
“Shhh,” Kaashaa automatically shushed the person who opened the door to Cara’s bedroom before looking up to see that it was Theron.
“So this is one of their reasons for having hissy fits?” the displeasure and disbelief were apparent in Theron’s voice as he looked down at the fragile woman sleeping fitfully on the quilted bed.
“One of them yes, Daddy.” Kaashaa answered giving him a hug as she saw Emily and Joseph both come into the room. “Come here you two.” She said smiling as the two came up behind her peeking around her legs at the man before them. “Now now since when are either of you two shy?” she chastised lightly smiling at Theron. “They’re growing up fast.”
“I’ll say,” Theron replied with a chuckle picking up Emily who squirmed, “You must be Emily.”
Marcus moved around the small family reunion and sat down in the opposite chair letting his fingers slide over the frail skin of Cara’s hand half wishing she would wake up – or that the two of them would shut up.
Theron watched the other vampire a mix of curiosity and surprise clear on his face but he didn’t say anything. It was the first time that Theron had seen anything but the rampant melancholy about Didyme’s death in Marcus.
“Potty, Mama.” Emily said insistently trying to get her mother’s attention frowning at Theron. “Need down. Potty.” She said promptly.
Theron chuckled and set the small girl on her feet and ushered them out the door, “Far be it for me to interrupt the wants of a little lady.”
Left alone with his thoughts again, Marcus watched the slow, but fortunately steady breaths raise and lower the thin chest and another stab of guilt and longing both twisted his feelings around – the want to be loyal to his long-lost mate and the compulsion to be around this fading light – one that he longed perplexingly to feed the dying fire of her spirit. “If only the choice were as easy to make as it was once,” he murmured thoughtfully, “This time… it would be wrong.” He said shaking his head as he slid her hand on top of his curling his thumb to brush over the top of it. “I won’t make that choice for you, you have to.” Marcus murmured as the young woman seemed to sleep through his touch as if he wasn’t there.
***
“How long as he behaved this way?” Theron asked Carlisle in a soft undertone, knowing that Carlisle would know exactly what he was referring to.
“Shortly after she came to stay with us.” Carlisle answered slowly, “What concerns me is how quickly her health is deteriorating.”
Kaashaa’s arm wrapped around Theron’s middle as she looked up at him, “Cara’s dying of stage four cancer, the medicine she got from the oncologist hasn’t done any good, it’s been pain management for the last few weeks.”
Theron drew in a thoughtful breath, “I’m assuming that Marcus is aware of the multiple rules his idiot brothers consider broken by now.”
“I don’t think he gives a flying squirrel’s ass.” Kaashaa remarked, “Given that he’s already told off the twinkle toe squad once about it.”
Theron’s brow quirked as he stroked over his daughter’s head gently watching his grandchildren play nearby with Nessie. “Now that is interesting, even I never quite anticipated a time in which Marcus would stand on his own for something that mattered to him, but not to the other two.”
“Marcus has been more reasonable since around the wedding,” Esme spoke up quietly from her seat near the three children completely content in her role of sitting near them as ‘grandma’, “Something about that girl called to him and its driven him nuts because no matter which way he turns, his hands are tied.”
“Either by the fact that he literally can’t, or because he won’t.” Elyshia pointed out lifting the bottle of water out of the refrigerator door. “And I can understand why not.”
“Carlisle?” Marcus’ concerned voice came from the doorway, “A word please?”
“Certainly,” Carlisle answered turning to Theron, “Please, excuse me.” Theron waved him off having half a guess at what Marcus would want and despite not wanting to overhear the conversation, everyone in the downstairs heard it anyway.
“I absolutely cannot clear her for that kind of trip, it – it would be unethical.” Carlisle protested after listening to what Marcus wanted.
“I’m not asking you to.” The tone was firm, but not altogether pleased by having to, “I’m telling you it’s what Cara wishes and it would be altogether too unkind to not grant the last wish she has.”
“I can’t.” Carlisle protested, “Marcus without the constant medication she’d never last the flight let alone see what it is you want to take her to.”
Marcus moved in closer the apathy replaced by a leashed anger as his voice lowered dangerously, “Cara’s last wish, Carlisle is to die with dignity – without the machines – not alone in a bed in a house full of vampires who might remember her for a century – maybe two but after that she’ll become a memory then a scattered thought.”
“Carlisle,” Kaashaa said walking through the kitchen door and putting a hand on his shoulder, “As medical professionals we know we can’t save everyone, and going into this we all knew this day was coming. Let the girl have her dignity.” Her voice trembled lightly looking up at Carlisle. “Let her go.”
Reluctantly Carlisle nodded, “We’ll begin the preparations tonight, I suggest you make your plans to go before I am finished.”
Marcus nodded as he turned to walk back up the stairs murmuring something softly,
Grazie, il mio amico.
***
“If it’s the right thing, why does it feel so wrong?” Carlisle asked no one in particular as he watched the tail lights to the car that Jasper was driving to take Cara and Marcus to the airport for the flight. He seriously doubted she would survive the flight, but as the others had spoken calmly when the topic had come up, the young woman deserved nothing more than to have her dignity restored before the end.
“Because you hate losing patients.” Esme answered walking behind him to rest her cheek on the back of his shoulder, wrapping her arms around his middle. “And you want deep down someone else to be whole again.” She said softer closing her eyes.
Sighing he nodded before turning his attention to Esme, “You’re right, that must be it.”
Esme smiled up at him and drew his attention for the time being away from the door with its empty night spread out before them reaching to close the door before pulling him in a light gesture to herself seeing the upset in the pale features cupping his cheek, “Marcus will do the right thing, something about that girl drew him to her and I do not think for no reason.” She said softly as they settled to wait for the phone call that was both wished-for and dreaded.
A day later the phone rang and as Esme answered she smiled hearing Marcus’ voice speaking into the receiver on the other side, “We’ve landed, and heading to the hotel, I’ll call whenever possible. Tell Carlisle I’ll look after her as best as I know how.”
“Of course, and you’ve had no other issues?” Esme answered him smiling with a bit of relief that Cara had weathered the trip successfully.
“Nothing that wasn’t expected,” Marcus answered watching as Cara sat down on the edge of the chair when there was a knock on the door to the hotel room, “Esme, I have to let you go the hotel’s brought up the bags and the things I requested for Cara, someone’s at the door.”
“All right, thank you for calling to let us know that all is well.” Esme answered as Marcus severed the connection.
He walked to the door of the hotel room and opened it surprised to find Jane standing on the other side of it, the bags he had requested sent up as well the wheeled chair and other supplies her eyes glinting up at him.
“Hello Master Marcus, it is good to see you again.” She said hauling the bags into the room casting an appraising look on the woman that had been the source of so much of the stress of the last months for herself, and Alec.
“Jane,” he greeted watching as she moved the rest of the items inside and cast a cool look to him, “Is there something I can do for you?” he queried carefully as she closed the door firmly.
“Well you’ve have made it less complicated if you’d have stayed in Forks but lookin’ at her I figure you had reasons for coming up to the Pindus Mountains.”
Marcus nodded at Jane before his attention turned back to Cara, helping her settle into the large comfortable chair, “Something my time with the Cullens reminded me of is that life – eternal or not – is not something that is lightly thrown away.”
Jane nodded, “I was starting to understand why the Cullens are the way they are when I had to go back. It was either me return or risk having Master Aro and Caius come at you with everything they have before you are ready to deal with them.”
Marcus nodded reaching to put his hand on her shoulder, “You have been a loyal guard a long time. I only hope your siding with me is not to your bitter end.” He said quietly.
“I am not what is important, what is important is that the Volturi grow and change with the times because while we have forever, they do not, and history has shown that which does not evolve is destroyed. I would not like seeing Volterra become a relic.” She answered sitting down on the edge of the bed as he stood near Cara’s chair. “Her heart’s weak,” Jane said after listening for a long minute to the silence, “What are you going to do, Master Marcus – time is no longer her friend?”
“I am firstly going to discover what she truly wishes for herself. And I will see that it is granted.” Marcus answered his hand on Cara’s, “First time in a great many years, Jane since I have felt but melancholy and madness, I would not like to see it come to an end without reason.”
Jane was quiet again for a dozen minutes, thinking over what Marcus had said, and nodded silently in agreement, “You do that, and I will guard you as I have for many years.” She said finally getting up to give again the young woman a look that was one part Hunger and one part pity. “I’ll delay any of the others that come looking for you unless it’s from Carlisle.”
For the next several days, Marcus’ time was spent either taking Cara different places in the cool mountains again watching as she took in the sights, and answering her questions about himself again. It was awkward for a moment when she asked about his interest in her, and why.
That afternoon was cool, and he had helped her into a thick, handmade lambwool sweater the color of the deep forests to keep her warm, smiling at the sever that had refilled her glass with fresh water coaxing her to eat and drink a bit more of the rich food as he talked.
“I’m not sure,” he admitted quietly as he watched her lift the spoonful of soup to her lips, his hand resting on the table again, “But, here we are and while yes, there is a part of me that would like nothing more than to either turn you, or drain you of every ounce of blood in your veins.” As she stopped eating he returned the startled look gently, “Cara, wanting to and actually doing so are two different things. I won’t do either unless that is what you ask of me.”
She accepted his answer and relaxed, having no cause to not believe in him, frowning gently, “I haven’t yet decided if I believe you.” She tilted her head to the side, “But I do not know if I want to take the chance either.”
Marcus nodded watching as she pushed the soup away after a half-dozen bites guiding the chair to the balcony’s edge sitting beside her in the nearby chair, “I won’t tell you that either option is right, I have been the way I am for a long time, I’ve all but forgotten what it is to be human, but not quite so long to have forgotten that dying and being remade into a vampire is painful.” He clasped her fragile hand in his drawing the dark eyes to his burgundy hued ones, “Cara, its excruciating pain but the end… when it’s over...” he shook his head, “My brothers aside, there is so much to see, so much to experience..” he trailed off watching her gently for a minute, “But it is not something I will choose for you.” He lowered his voice to a whisper that barely met her ears, “whatever your choice, I will respect it.”
Cara nodded and closed her eyes “How long are we supposed to be here,” she asked him quietly the dark eyes opening to slits as her body trembling lightly.
“Another three days, then we fly back to Forks before Carlisle works a rut into Esme’s floors worrying himself if you’re all right or in need of something.”
Please review and tell us what you think. Don't worry you'll find out what becomes of Cara soon. :D