Why I Like You

Anita: I like Damian because he is my vampire servant to call and will do anything I ask of him.

(Damian out of camera to himself: It's not like I have a choice.)

Claudia: I like Damian because he is a kick ass Viking warrior.

(Damian: is that why you called me a noncombatant, biotch?)

Jean-Claude: I like Damian because he is a good employee and makes me LOTS of money.

Richard: I like Damian because Anita fucks with him the way she fucks with me.

(Damian: No truer words, brother, no truer words)

Anita: I like Damian because he helps me stay calm.

Richard: I like Damian because he helps YOU stay calm.

(Richard and Anita hairy eyeball each other)

Meng Die: I like Damian because he doesn't fuck with me.

Asher: I like Damian but wish he were more open minded.

Micah: I like Damian because he doesn't HAVE to sleep with Anita every night.

Nathaniel: What are you implying, my Nimir raj? Are you saying you don't want me sleeping with you and Anita anymore? Is that it? You want me out of yours and Anita's bed?"

Richard nudging Asher: He's been taking acting lessons from you.

Asher *smiling at Richard*: You think I was kidding when I said I was going to have your hairy ass....and YOU WILL LIKE IT.

Jean-Claude: Oh great! *sigh* I like Damian because he doesn't give me any difficulties...AT ALL.

Nathaniel *teary eyed*: I like Damian because he doesn't want to throw me out of his and Anita's bed.

(Damian: Like I have one?)

Micah: I didn't say you couldn't sleep with Anita and me, but sometimes I like sleeping with my queen alone.

Nathaniel: I was there first!

Richard: No technically Jean-Claude was there first, then me, then Micah, then Byron. Which reminds me, Jean-Claude I think you need to turn him loose now."

Jean-Claude *head in hands*: Oui, Oui! Uh...Graham, go release him."

Jamil: I like Damian. *shrugs shoulders*

Shang-Da: Yes, he was supposed to have been a great warrior at one time before Anita turned him into a vampire version of a mindless zombie.

(Damian: the bastard never says more than two words and today he has a speech?)

Requiem: Damian my flaming haired brother in arms, about the only two straight vampires in St. Louis.

Elinore: My Dark Knight is straight I have you know!

Requiem: All right, him too. *shrugs shoulders*

Jason: I like Damian cause he's a cool dancer, a lady's romancer, a dude with fangs and sexy moves.

Nathaniel: Why did you bring up you and Anita then if it's all right for me to sleep with you two?"

Micah: Oh Fuck! I wish I hadn't said anything. *getting up and walking away*

Camera fades