Love of My Life

CHAPTER VIII

CHRISITAN'S POV

To say that I was pissed at Lissa was an understatement.  She was hurting my Rose and I didn’t like it one bit.  Because they didn’t agree on this one little aspect she was willing to let their friendship end.  Then she was letting her jealously over the closeness of me and Rose also decide her position on their friendship.  A true friend wouldn’t do that no matter what.  They would put their jealously aside and put on a brave face and let the feeling of companionship wash over them.  But Lissa didn’t appear to be that selfless.

It was not Rose's fault that she would have everything Lissa wanted, that blame rested solely on her.  If she truly wanted us she would not have given us up.  She would have found a way to make things work in her favor but that is not how she thinks.  She was letting her son go like he was a burden to her.  To me that was unforgivable  Than she came here to let Rose go as she too was a burden.  Lissa had dug her grave with me.  She was lucky that she was a woman and I a man or I would have decked her right in her face for the pain she was causing my Rose and the pain she will eventually cause my son.  I just hoped that Rose would be enough for him like she was with me.  I hoped that he would allow her to be the mother he deserved and didn’t push her away once he learned the truth.  Despite Lissa's wishes my loyalty was first to my son, he would know the truth of his heritage.  He would know that even though he is an Ozera he is one of the last Dragomirs alive.  I would never deny him that.  And I could only hope that Rose would agree with me on this.  

With a heavy sigh I went back to watching my Rose sleep.  Her pain was my pain and that is how it will be forever between us.  Rose was it for me.  She was my forever they day that she left the world I knew I would soon follow.  I would die of a broken heart, that is just how much she means to me.  She is my lover and my best friend, and very soon I will be making her my wife.  That thought always made me smile.  Rosemarie Ozera, sounded like poetry to me.  Like a sweet song I could listen to forever.  Just like every time she told me she loved me, it was something that I would never grow tired of.

About an hour later Rose started to wake up, it took her a moment to focus on where she was.  Her puffy and slightly pink eyes sadden me.  I didn’t like the fact that she had been hurting.  I would do everything in my power to try and make her feel better but I don’t think there is much I can do, this is wound that would have to heal on its own.

“Do you know what the worst part of all of this is?” she asked me out of the blue.

“No what?”

“I can still feel her emotions and read her thoughts.” she told me as she pushed herself up and leaned against the headboard of her bed while she brought her knees up to chest to wrap her arms around them.  “The whole time she was talking to me I felt everything.  She truly was envious of me.  But what hurt worse was the fact that I also felt hatred towards me.  The sisterly love we use to have between us, I couldn’t feel it any of that.” she told me as a few tears escaped the tight control she was trying to hold on her emotions.  I ached to wiped it from her face but I knew that in this moment she didn’t want me to.  She wanted to get all out before she broke down again.  “When she told me that she didn’t know how to repair our friendship, I got the feeling that she didn’t really want to.  There is just to many negative emotions she has towards me that however we tried it would not work.  The moment she walked out of that door, was the moment that we stopped being friends.  And though I knew it was coming and thought I could handle it and that it wouldn’t bother me, I was wrong.  Lissa has been the only family I have known all my life.  And with her gone, I just feel like there is this big gaping hole that I don’t know if I can ever recover from.” at this point I had to pull her into my arms, to comfort her.  

“It will get better Rose.  And pretty soon we will have our own family so you have to feel alone.” I told her as kissed the top of her head and held her close.

“She walked out on all of us Christian, do we mean so little to her, that she would sacrifice us for her political career?” she asked sobbing into my chest.

“She is blinded by the one goal she has set her path on.  What she has done she thinks is for the best.  No matter how unforgivable it is to her, it is just the way Lissa operates.  She will find herself very lonely very soon and when she does we wont be there to help her.  And it is not because we don’t want to, but we will have someone else to consider, someone we will have to protect from her abandonment.  What you are feeling right now is understandable and necessary so you can begin to let her go.” I told her gently. “And it is only temporary because I promise I will do all that I can to try and fill that gaping hole for you, my Rose.” I told her as I pulled back enough to look her in the eye.  “Together we will have our family, and I will put the world at your feet if it will make you feel better.  Just tell me what you need and it will be done.”

“Just love me and promise to never leave me.” she said with her eyes pleading with me, “Promise to be my rock and my knight.  Love and take care of me, give me a reason to live, give me a family that we can both be proud of and love with all our hearts.  Grow old and die with me, that is all I ask from you.”

“That is what I shall give you.” I told her just before my lips reached her.  I would fight and kill to keep this promise to her.  And I will begin making sure certain aspect of it will soon come true.